First Kiss: The 11 Secret Messages You Send
Let’s get down with one of my favorite subjects….
The Kiss.
I watched this the first time with the sound off….
)
This video went viral on Tuesday, and then got a lot of flack because the people involved are models, musicians and performers – but say what you will – there is real life chemistry in this video and here’s what you can learn from it:
About the Way We Flirt
♥ Hair Touching Signals: During a 51 second time period in the above video, a woman touches her hair every 15 seconds (watch at 10 seconds, 26 seconds, 35 seconds, 50 seconds and again at 1:01 seconds) This is a tell-tale instinctual flirting sign.
♥ Mirroring: At 2:52, notice the woman mirroring the exact same stance as the man with her hands behind her back. We mirror the actions people we are attracted to.
♥ Slightly Exaggerated Facial Expressions: Notice all the lip biting, lip licking and raised eyebrows with direct eye contact before the kiss even takes place. Women also tend to blink more around someone they are interested in (watch :10-:15 and :34-:35 to see a lot of blinking going on). Heightened facial expressions are a subtle sign of interest.
♥ The Eye Contact Gaze/Look Away/Gaze Back: We speak volumes with eye contact. The classic move of holding a direct gaze, looking down or away and then holding that gaze again is a subconscious flirting MUST. When looking at videoed performances of my burlesque routines, that is one thing I notice myself doing consistently – it’s my natural instincts in effect – flirting with the audience.
♥ The Innocent Brush Against: Notice our girl at 2:49, brushing down his chest after the kiss and then going on to mirror his body language. She is loving this guy.
♥ The All-Encompassing Move. Notice how the woman moves at the 1:14 mark – she leans in to his right and to his left while looking down and then ends touching his forehead with her own. This is a super hot flirty move – plus the foreheads touching signifies connection. Those moments before a kiss are electric…make them last with softly brushing noses, coming inches away from their lips with your own, and dragging the side of your face along theirs.
About the Way We Kiss
The interesting tell-tale signs of a kiss have nothing to do with the mouth to mouth part. It has everything to do with where we place our hands.
♥ The Romantic Kiss. At 1:37 – the woman’s hands clasped behind his neck is the classic I’m-feeling-super-romantic-toward-you move. Think faerie tales and poetry.
♥ The I Want You Now Kiss. Grabbing your lover’s face and cradling their face in your hands is a lusty hot signal. Watch 2:07 – serious, Brother, damn those are some moves. I also like to throw in raking my nails across the back of a lover’s neck and taking their earlobe between my thumb and pointer finger and squeezing.
♥ The I Think You’re Cool But I’m Not Into You Kiss. At 2:02, notice how the couple is holding each other at the waist with distance in between like they are slow dancing in middle school. This couple has a appreciation connection, but there’s no love match there.
♥ The I’m A Little Kinky Kiss. At 2:18, notice our guy biting her upper lip. This is a playful message that he’s into a bit more than just your average romance.
♥ The Sensualist Kiss. At 2:24, notice their noses softly dragging across each other while they kiss slowly. These are people who like to take their time and indulge in a world of passion.
What does your kissing style say about you?
Special Message to You: After Tuesday’s post on the Terry Richardson scandal and my own brush with a manipulative photographer, I want to thank all of you who shared, re-tweeted and commented.
I can’t stop the predators, but I can share my experience in their tactics to help you recognize them and get out of there.
Thank you for reading – this is for you:
Rahul
Hahahaha. My first kiss was awkward. This article should have come at an earlier time LOL. But interesting and very helpful points there. 🙂
July 23, 2018
John Shifu
Well written, veronica. First kiss is one of the most memorable moments in a relationship. It is one of the best way to let the other person knnw about our feelings.
September 18, 2019